November 21, 2006

// March 1st, 2011 // Uncategorized

It’s strange. While we’re in the early years of rearing our children our lives feel so out of control yet we are basically in control, at least of their daily goings on. I think we become accustomed to this feeling of being in control. But in parenting, when you do a good job, you put yourself out of a job, essentially losing that sense of control. I don’t think of myself as being a control freak but I think that the lesson God might be trying to teach me during this difficult Thanksgiving season is “let go”. I’ve always wanted to facilitate (make easy) gatherings, either in our home or elsewhere. Mom’s been so sick that I fear this could be her last Thanksgiving. I really wanted to make it a good one for her by having all of her children and most of her grand- and great-grandchildren here surrounding her on her favorite day of the year. We have run into several obstacles: Mom’s deteriorating health, and certain family member’s lack of interest in joining the family. Last night I asked God, “What AM I supposed to be learning from all of this???” He answered me loud and clear, “YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL! IT’S NOT UP TO YOU!” I wasn’t sure if I should cry or feel free. I cried a little (with relief). It’s not up to me what others do. I can be disappointed that some of my kids choose not to spend every Thanksgiving with us (even though I don’t observe the other traditional holidays). I can be disappointed that some of Mom’s kids won’t be here. It’s not up to me! Until last night I just haven’t been in the Thanksgiving mood this year. But now I know that the only thing that is up to me is ME, and my attitude. So with that understanding, I plan to have a thankful Thanksgiving Day!

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